I write this entry sitting on the fifth floor of the Little Rock Main Library, staring out at the city. Once more, I have been left to wait while the person I live with has dropped me here while they tend to business. Once more I sit and wait happily. That many of the core details have changed–I’m here waiting to go to work–seems irrelevant.
There is a grain of truth to the idea we don’t really change. I’ve written on this site before. It was my sanctum as a child. In my bout of depression last fall it was my sanity. It is now and always will be a safe place. Definitely in no danger of being rebuilt. The location remains almost astonishingly top of the line.
Sitting here turns my mind to similar thoughts. How much have I changed? I openly admit my 30s have been a rough transition to the point I should talk to someone. I know I have changed greatly in some aspects of my life. After all I’m married and fully adult. But aren’t there areas I haven’t?
My taste has changed in some ways. I haven’t seen a straight Simpsons episode in years when I used to live on it. South Park is dead to me honestly. Family Guy is all but. I don’t read tie-ins 1/10 as much as I used to. I think I’ve read a Star Wars novel in the last year. Films are another matter there.
But then, I ponder how much of that stems from those works changing. In all cases the soul is gone. Of course I’ve moved on. They haven’t. That drives much of evolution of taste after all.
I pause to think of what stays. I can’t rewatch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or sadly even Ducktales with the same fervor as I’ve moved past them. Yet Peanuts, Looney Tunes, and Mickey Mouse are eternal. Garfield, aside from the great 90s toon, sits in the past but Calvin and Hobbes and FoxTrot books sit gladly on my shelf ever to return to. Oddities stay too. Paddington Bear showed shocking legs with Michael Bond’s hysterical books playing surprisingly well to an adult as well as Paul King’s wonderful film. I have no idea how Big Nate, which I had a lone book of, remains but it does. Star Wars, The X-Files, and Pixar have been too continuous in my life to ever put in the past.
And then there’s me. I’m not the cyclist I once was but I remain an avid traveler. I hope I’m still possessed of my best traits from childhood. I still write at every spare moment including now. I still value friendship with that evolving into being a devoted husband. I live to watch/go to the movies though not as often as before due to life.
Life changes. I value what doesn’t and what never should. So, I’ll stand up. As in my youth I’ll walk to Broadway and grab lunch. And all will be good.